Blog #53. Crossing the Threshold

Doors open all the time. Some swing wide while others creak just enough for us to slip through. But an open door isn’t the same as a seat at the table, and a seat at the table isn’t the same as feeling like you are truly valued.

Inclusion is the invitation, the open door. But belonging? That requires stepping through as yourself—not as the person you think the room wants. And if we’re still wearing masks to fit in, are we really belonging at all?

In a recent Hidden Brain (3 March 2025) episode, Dropping the Mask, legal scholar Kenji Yoshina explored how we shape-shift in social spaces, presenting adapted versions of ourselves to gain acceptance. He called it “covering.” If belonging depends on performance, then it’s not belonging—it’s conformity.

Belonging is about more than just being welcomed; it’s about being embraced—flaws, quirks, contradictions, and all. And yet, even that isn’t the final step. Because belonging is still an individual experience. Community, however, is a collective one.

There’s a big difference between inclusion, belonging, and community.

·       Inclusion opens the door. You are invited in.

·       Belonging is stepping in and being real, feeling seen, valued, and accepted.

·       Community is dynamic—built on reciprocity, consistency, and shared values. It’s not just a space you enter; it’s a living, breathing entity that grows stronger through engagement and mutual investment.

Community cannot thrive if its members are performing belonging. Real community asks for presence, not perfection. It’s where you can show up as you are, where honesty is welcomed, and where your contributions matter because they come from an authentic place.

For women stepping into their third chapter, this is especially critical. Many of us have spent decades adjusting, accommodating, and proving ourselves—whether in careers, relationships, or social circles. We may have been included, but we haven’t always felt valued. Now is the time to flip that script.

But what happens when we let the mask slip? What if, instead of waiting for belonging to be granted, we took the next step and created community through honesty, consistency, and shared purpose?

Aging in power—Where Wisdom Meets Wonder—is about more than defying expectations. It’s about building spaces where we don’t have to pose to belong. It’s about forging communities where mutual support replaces silent competition, where deep connection outshines superficial inclusion.

So, ask yourself: Where do you still feel like you have to perform belonging? And where have you found the rare magic of community that allows you to simply be?

If you’re looking for that kind of space, you’re not alone. At WonderCrone, we’re not just holding open the door—we’re building a table where wisdom, wonder, and a few shenanigans are always welcome. We’ve created a membership community on Mighty Networks called Where Wisdom Meets Wonder. Come as you are. Stay as yourself. Let’s do this together.